Living for Today

by Ashley on April 21, 2010

As I sit down to write this blog, a thousand things race through my mind.  That’s just the person that I am… an OCD, multi-tasker to be exact :-) …. but I like it that way.  Sometimes Dustin will try to keep up with me, but other days he just simply says, “Can’t that be done later?”  When something comes to my mind I want to ‘do it now’ or I want it ‘done now.’ That’s not necessarily a good thing, but just who I am.  So as I was deciding whether or not to sit down and blog or wait until we have further news (explained below), I obviously decided, that yes, I will blog now.

I’m sitting at the house alone right now, which feels very weird. Actually, I’m in Orlando, Florida by myself, not just this house.  I am alone during the day most of the days anyways, but I always know that Dustin will be home shortly, however, today that is not the case.  This morning I took Dustin to the Orlando airport because he is flying to Atlanta for an MRI (thank you, God).  Tomorrow morning will tell Dustin a lot.  We are praying for there to be no tear, but are also willing to accept any plan that God may have for us.  There is still unexplainable pain in Dustin’s shoulder so maybe this MRI will tell him why.

Tonight, Dustin is going to the game in Atlanta and I am really hoping that it truly inspires him to keep working hard and to fight through this injury.  Seeing Turner Field versus any minor league stadium is a huge difference.  His friend Jonny is most likely going to pitch, so I hope that this gives him the encouragement he needs in order to know that it too could be him out on the mound one day soon.  I’ll keep you posted when we hear something :-) .

Yesterday, during more time alone, I decided to walk into town, have a glass of wine, and read my book (I’m reading ‘Love the One You’re With’ right now by Emily Giffin).  Whenever I see people in a restaurant alone I always wonder what their story is and why they are alone; sometimes I even feel sorry for them and say to myself, “You don’t have one friend you could call?”  But after being that girl yesterday, I found a new understanding for those people.  I could have stayed at home, sat on the front porch, poured myself a glass of wine and read my book there, but sometimes it’s just nice to have a change of scenery and try a new glass of wine.

As I sat outside of the wine bar my mind just raced yet again.  I opened my book, started to read and realized that I wasn’t reading at all; I was simply scanning the words.  I was thinking about my life and my love and appreciation of it.  I was thanking God for my blessings and for giving me such an incredible journey.  Thankful for the birds chirping, the wind blowing the pages of my book, the dogs walking by (thinking about my dog at home), the soft jazz music playing in the back ground, which I learned through reading ‘Blue Like Jazz’ that things like jazz music are only appreciated after seeing someone else have such a strong love for it, but mostly, thankful for Dustin, who not by choice, has brought me here and has provided me with this life that I live.

Whenever people ask me, “How’s Orlando?”  I always respond, “It’s great.  I really love the town of Celebration!”  But is that really an accurate response?  Would Dustin say the same?  I don’t think so.  He sees Orlando as a trap.  The only reason we have to be here is for spring training and/ or rehab.  Rehab equals pain and not playing baseball, so why would he like it here?  Although we continuously question why he can’t just be playing and/or healthy, we do rejoice this time we have together and the life that we live.  So regardless of how things turn out with baseball, Dustin and I both know God always has a plan for us and is carrying us on his back.

Tonight, since Dustin won’t be joining me at the dinner table, I first thought I would just make a spinach salad or a wrap for myself, but instead I’ve decided I’m going to make a yummy dinner, just make a lot less of it :-) .  Dustin hates quinoa (pronounced keen-wa) but I absolutely love it, so tonight, I am going to use it as my main ingredient!   Quinoa is a grain, a good substitute for brown rice, whole wheat pasta, etc., but contains much more protein than any of those… it’s actually considered both a protein and a carb… I just love it!  I’m trying to eat less meat these days, were going to try Meatless Mondays, and use protein substitutes such as beans, legumes, quinoa, etc., but it’s hard when I have a meat loving husband!  Last night I made a delicious pot of Minestrone and the first question Dustin asked me was, “What kind of meat is in it?” “Kidney beans, garbanzo beans, and Jerusalem Artichoke Flour pasta” is my answer.  Kidney beans contain 8g of protein, garbanzo beans containing 9g, and the pasta containing 7…that’s more than enough protein to me!

I found a quote that I really like, I don’t remember who it’s by, but I think it is a great quote to end this blog and way to acknowledge Earth Day (tomorrow) … Which by the way, I’m very excited about Earth Day and Dustin thinks I’m just ridiculous :-) , so I guess it’s a good thing that he will be gone all day tomorrow and I can celebrate Earth Day all alone and truly enjoy making my herb garden without his help!

Back to the quote, however :-)

“Make the most of the time we have on this beautiful earth, for all we KNOW is that we live, breath and die.”

P.S.  Somehow this post went from being thankful for my life to more nutrition, food, health stuff….like I said above, I’m an OCD, mulit-tasker, and that’s my only excuse.

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